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Monday, January 29, 2007

The Real Super Bowl Press Conference

The mainstream reporters shuffled out of the press conference, armed with pleasant and thoughtful quotes from Coach Dungy. Things like, "it's an honor to represent black coaches"; "I am proud of all our team has accomplished this year"; "I had every confidence in Peyton to come through for this team".

Dungy has been saying the right things and presenting the right image for years. Carefully constructing that non-threatening, thoughtful and inherently respectful persona that has led to a nice tenure as an NFL head coach. We see him on TV after games, a balanced personality delivering meticulously crafted orations intended to ensure that people understand that he is a football coach first and foremost, that his love of the game and love of his team is something that is completely separate from the color of his skin or the curliness of his hair.

Now that he has reached the pinnacle of his profession, Coach Dungy can finally let his hair down, so to speak.

"Dawg, we fittin' to show da Bears what they made of, fo' real!"

"Tell Lovie he best not to come up in here wit dat weak azz O an' shit! We not playin', you seen how my D been eatin' teams up, right? I know you see us. We right HERR! Don't even act like you cain't see!"

"Urlacher? What I think 'bout Urlacher? Yo, da boy a'ight. He play a pretty tight game. Ain't no Ray Lewis, but da boy can bawl on any given Sunday. We a'see what he got fo' us. Eh, like I sayd, da boy can play and I ainna 'boutta give him mo' locker room mot'vation dan he need. It up to Lovie to get him redd ta play, not me."

"Naw, dawg. Hell to da naw. Two week off ain't nuttin but a thang. No rust. No loss of m'mentum. Some our old guys like Saturday an Marvin be gettin' mad rest an' is jus' rechargin'. Dey fittin' to bring it real down in the MIA come Sundy, ya heard!"

"Eh, well, den that how it gonna be. Black coach versus black coach. And you can tell Whitlock: Get ya pen ready, dawg, cause'a see some black on black violence. And dat's REAL TALK, dawg..."

"Man, I ain't even gonna mess 'round wit dat type a question. If ya think Peyton shot his load las' week and ain't showin' up this week...well, dawg, I ain't got nuthin' fo' ya. You entitled to ya opinion an' can aks whateveh type question ya wants to. But on the real, if ya think I aintta have my boys hungry and figthin' ta win...well, don't know me. You might see me in the street, but nigga you don't know me..."


Anonymous said...

I can't figure out if you are a genius or a retard. You walk a fine line.

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"can't figure out if you are a genius or a retard"

Sir, how coincidental; we were going to say the same of you.

Anonymous said...

yaaaay stereotypes!

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"yaaaay stereotypes"

Sir, your enthusiam is admired. And we cheer you back "yaaaay overcoming ignorance"!