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Monday, October 8, 2007

Jacob Hester: Ode to the White Running Back

In days of yore, you ran free in packs
All over the field, white running backs.

Fast Negro runners with amazing grace,
Slowly began to take your place.

Once there was Riggins and his mohawk,
Now you line up and mostly block.

Slow of foot and without much style,
We watch you try and it makes us smile.

You lower your shoulders and get three yards,
Moving less like backs, more like guards.

They talk of your motor and how hard you compete,
And try not to mention your clumsy feet.

But like the infrequent moon that's blue,
There are the times you still come through.

At the end of the game; it couldn't come later,
You drove through the line to defeat the Gator.

Jacob Hester, we will cut you some slack
You aren't too bad for a white running back.

40 comments:

Kyle Smith said...

Let us not forget the Rams Brian Leonard, who ran for over 100 yards yesterday.

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"Let us not forget the Rams Brian Leonard, who ran for over 100 yards yesterday."

Sir, indeed. This weekend past will be known forever as the weekend of the White RB.

TacoBellManager said...

Desperately trying to come up with something that rhymes with "Vardell."

Sir, this was brilliant.

censored said...

this rhyme is proof that NOIS must be a white guy from the midwest. Everybody knows a real brother could come up with a better rap than this....maybe you should give Isiah Thomas a call to help you pepper in some "bitch and ho" references to get you some street cred.
I eagerly await your rhyme on how Marion Jones took steroids because of the white man.

Tripod said...

"bitch and ho"

naw...he don't need to pepper in a bitch or ho...your precense here takes care of both..

Martin said...

"Everybody knows a real brother could come up with a better rap than this"

Sir, Wayne Brady agrees with your notion.

John Blaze said...

You forgot a stanza:

You restructure your contract; you eschew greed / Sportscasters talk of your "deceptive speed."

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"You restructure your contract; you eschew greed / Sportscasters talk of your "deceptive speed.""


Sir, excellent add on to the 'ode'.

let's also add....

You cover punts, you cover kicks
On third and short, you're in the mix.

Jose said...

Everybody knows that a brother from the nation, doesn't use words like bitches and ho's, infidel.

Dave the Wave said...

dear god, first you were just a special needs blogger...now you are a poet.

help us.

Malcom Hex said...

it's about time someone recognized the white running back.

and it took NOIS to be the one.

you should be the NFL's poet laureate (sp?)

Gern said...

Where's the outrage for a blindingly white QB (Trent Green) trying to take out a brother just for trying to get his game on? And now a day later all the white media is blaming holmes for getting pissy?? That's lame.

Five Pound Bag said...

I have not read the Koran (shame) but I imagine it flows similarly to this eloquent rhyme.

Also, pale young RB Danny Woodhead of Chadron State set an NCAA all-divisions total yardage record this weekend:

You can put up big stats in a lower division,
where your efforts will meet with success, not derision.

uncommon sense said...

"You can put up big stats in a lower division,
where your efforts will meet with success, not derision."

i don't know what you are trying to say...but SUPER!

Andrew said...

much respect nois for your great work, but may i humbly add just one more stanza...

out of the backfield ready and eager/the scouts can't respect a possession receiver

censored said...

you dont smoke weed/ you dont do crack....you sure its true your a running back?

censored said...

You can put up big stats in a lower division,
where your efforts will meet with success, not derision.

kinda like when you got your GED.

Tripod said...

"you dont smoke weed/ you dont do crack....'

read up on some of john riggins off field exploits homey...you might have to edit that...

LSUBoyz said...

alright stop, collaborate and listen, hesters back with a brand new edition. defenders, grab ahold of him tightly, try to diss him and call him whitey. Will it ever stop yo? I don't know, put ya on your ass and say take that NEGRO!

Moonglade said...

Perhaps I'll take a few minutes of my time and compose a little ditty to that low, average black IQ we all know about.


In modern days, we have the ways
to gauge cognition and so phrase
by number's verified arrays
in which observed a fact to thrive
a black IQ of eighty-five.

Da troof said...

Another few stanzas you left out:

Five years of college and got his degree, a welfare office his eyes will never see,
Always works hard and doesn't complain, Tell me Travis Henry, do you know your kids' names?
After the games he heads to the showers, not having to deal with baby mommas for hours.
After the game which he won on sheer will, nobody squinted from the glare off his grill.

Steven A's Cheese Doodles said...

"In modern days, we have the ways
to gauge cognition and so phrase
by number's verified arrays
in which observed a fact to thrive
a black IQ of eighty-five."

you went to LSU, and you are calling ANYONE else stupid?

really???!!!

Jeff Reed's blowdryer said...

"Five years of college and got his degree"

yea, but it's a degree from LSU...may as well be printed on toilet paper.

Plantation_Cracker said...

Try ode to the black heavyweight champion for your next rant Willis.

12% of the population=56% of its inmates. Ya'll got us beat there too.

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"12% of the population=56% of its inmates. Ya'll got us beat there too."

Sir, first. Check your numbers. Negroes make up more than 12% of the pop.

Second, your racist pride is quite impressive. You are proud that the FOR PROFIT prison industry has targeted the lower class and specific demographics as it's means to generate income for the white stockholders?

Interesting.

Plantation_Cracker said...

Sir, first. Check your numbers. Negroes make up more than 12% of the pop.

Not in the US. 12% is the number.

My pride is "non-minority".

The prison industry--FOR PROFIT--as you put it, or otherwise does not inculcate the court system with "get Homey". They don't need to. Homey does that all by his'self.

With the OJ's, Rae Carruth's, and CARR brothers of the world in existence the FOR PROFIT prison industry must feel like they've won the lottery.

Where's Kunta Kinte when you need him?

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"Not in the US. 12% is the number."

Not according to the US Census bureau.

IN 2005, it was 13.4%, with an increase of over half a million in population from just the previous year.

Demographic studies show that within 50 years, with the current shifting demographics rates, whites will be a minority in America.

So, the future is bright. Well, actually, dark.

"The prison industry--FOR PROFIT--as you put it"

Sir, for profit is not simply 'how we put it'. It is what it is. The US govt and state govt's have outsourced prison operations to FOR profit companies. These companies don't make money for their owners/stock holders if the cells aren't full.

It doesn't take a PhD in economics (not that you could even get a BA) to figure out how it works.

Lobbiest representing the industry have for YEARS been the impetus for harsher penalities for lesser crimes and for the counter productive and useless 'war on drugs'. Rather than follow some of the socially progressive models that have WORKED in Europe, the palm greasers from the prison industry have been able to 'convince' our legislators that turn style imprisonment is the best means to do things...

Seriously, we realize that you are a simple, plantation cracker, but....try reading a book once in awhile. You might get a better understanding of the interaction between big business, politics and society.

"Where's Kunta Kinte when you need him?"

Banging your woman.

Steve said...

I've got 1000 dollars on the [white] man who invented landmines over the fast negro who can't do simple arithmetic.

Moonglade said...

"So, the future is bright. Well, actually, dark."

The future of AIDS perhaps. Black IQ's are too low for this race to ever become preeminent. Black nations are the poorest and most dysfunctional in the world and it's been that way for centuries. You're a dumb race with small brains.

Moonglade said...

"So, the future is bright. Well, actually, dark."

The future of AIDS perhaps. Black IQ's are too low for this race to ever become preeminent. Black nations are the poorest and most dysfunctional in the world and it's been that way for centuries. You're a dumb race with small brains.

Moonglade said...

"
Demographic studies show that within 50 years, with the current shifting demographics rates, whites will be a minority in America."

Only if illegal immigration continues unabated. And we know what that means. More mestizos. You know that mestizo gangs have just about declared war on blacks in the southwest? They kill more blacks than anyone else. Niggers have no future here or anywhere. Their nations beg for monetary aid to solve their problems because they can't do it themselves. The black world is pretty much on welfare with whites, their masters, footing the bill. You were never able to keep up with whites and it's hilarious that you think you ever could.

Now take the bone out of your nose.

Mike said...

All of you people should be ashamed of yourselves. Your posts are disgusting and have no place in 2008. And people wonder why racism is perpetuating...

fat said...

do you seriously feel that threatened by the presence of a white runningback to make a poem like that?

fat said...

"Lobbiest representing the industry have for YEARS been the impetus for harsher penalities for lesser crimes and for the counter productive and useless 'war on drugs'. Rather than follow some of the socially progressive models that have WORKED in Europe, the palm greasers from the prison industry have been able to 'convince' our legislators that turn style imprisonment is the best means to do things..."


Lobbiest? is that someone with a bunch of lobs? oh i think you mean Lobbyist, I like how you try to use big words and try to sound smart like you know what you're talking about, you are probably one of those black power people that talks kind of slow and makes sure he articulates words but instead it just sounds awkward, I can hear it now "legis-LATE-ORS"

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"Lobbiest? is that someone with a bunch of lobs? oh i think you mean Lobbyist, I like how you try to use big words and try to sound smart like you know what you're talking about, you are probably one of those black power people that talks kind of slow and makes sure he articulates words but instead it just sounds awkward, I can hear it now "legis-LATE-ORS"

Sir, we thank you for correcting our typo.

We'd like to return the favor.

Here is your homework. Please look up the rules for using a period. Then, look up the rules for using a comma. Next, re-write your comment following the rules of English grammar.

Gosh, it's so annoying when someone tries to act all intelligent but can't write a properly formed paragraph. The writing ends up reading soooo awkwardly...and it SLOWS the reader down.

Are you one of those white people that has the writing stylistics of a fourth grader? God, we hate them!

fat said...

yes, I'm sorry, for Not using commas, and proper grammar, if, i do, does that make me more intelligent? first of all, i do not try to sound intelligent,
i do not try to post or edit posts to be proper English, i see this as a forum, which is like talking in real life, i do not use proper english in real life, most people dont, i do however try to pronounce and spell words properly, if i don't know how i will look it up, and if i typed a word wrong, i go back and correct it. and i am not totally white, nobody is a pure race. Yes, the government probably brings drugs into the country and distributes to poor black people to sell it. That makes the "white" man evil, but it makes the guy who does the dirty work for him, dumb. Not everyone in the government is "white" either, lots of jews, african-americans, and lots of zionist-influenced whites are present too. None of these races are exempt from greed.

Our interests are in Israel, our only ally in the middle east and i understand the relationship we have with them, it is important.

about the prison industry, it IS greed. people with lots of power bring in the drugs for profit (greed) the lower class distributes it for profit (greed), even though they know the consequences of getting caught. Then if they get caught the powers that be make more profit (greed) So if the lower class keeps on trying to make a buck and SELLING drugs the "white" man brings in, it is also their fault, they are continuing this vicious cycle. If they look beyond a few dollars and try to rise above then we would not have so many african americans in prison, but greed motivates, regardless of race, gender, or class. If the rich "white" man didnt have the lower class to do the dirty work for him, then there would not be a war on drugs or anybody to distribute them to poor communities. They would not profit off of african americans distributing THEIR product, and they also wouldn't profit from being able to lock them up for distributing the very same product they gave them. That is the way to stop the cycle. You can't blame it all on "whitey" everyone involved in the process is the reason it continues to go on.

yes yes, bash away at poor grammar

but this is not what i came here to talk about, english, grammar or spelling, i merely called out your typo to get your attention because you did not answer my original post

Do you seriously feel that threatened by the presence of a white running back to make such a a stereotypical racist poem?

That would be like me making a poem about Mcnabb struggling, but I don't because I am not threatened by the presence of a black quarterback, any race should be allowed to play any position they want to if they are capable. Peyton Hillis ran 129 yards against the Jets last week who have a good run d. oh please make a poem about him breaking off several 19 yard runs slipping through tackles, i guess he isnt capable, lets think of things to call him besides clumsy feet: "hard worker" "over acheiver" "brings his lunch pail to work" "understands the game" maybe even "deceptively fast" you know hillis and beanie wells had similiar stats coming out of high school, production and speed. they both ran a 4.5 coming out of high school, hillis produced a little more rushing, but why was hillis converted to fullback, maybe he doesnt have those loose hips we often hear that whites do not possess. what nfl team couldnt use a power back that averages over 4 yards a carry and runs a 4.58 (it would be faster but houston nutt had him put on 20 or 30 pounds to BLOCK for mcfadden and jones, i mean it was a legit 4.5 out of hs) if he dropped 10 to 20 pounds hed be faster (not saying he is even slow)

what about denver vs miami several weeks ago
where the two leaders in receiving yardage were *GASP* white guys, peyton hillis and greg cammarillo, A FULLBACK getting over 100 yards in receiving, most coming after the catch, and the announcers said "a fullback isnt supposed to move like that"
it will only be a matter of time before some racist player takes a cheap shot on him like the other week against welker, or when a "true" rb comes back

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

" i do not try to sound intelligent"

Sir,

We're shocked!

fat said...

great way to avoid any type debate against what i said. just keep going in circles and avoiding questions.

WHY DOES THE PRESENCE OF A WHITE RUNNINGBACK THREATEN YOU SO MUCH THAT YOU HAVE TO MAKE A POEM ABOUT IT DEGRADING THIS HARD WORKING MAN?

people like you have an inferiority complex, everything is about race. Just because some black athlete might be better than a white one doesn't make YOU better than a white athlete. It doesnt make you better than anyone PERIOD. Get over your racist bs, all races are the same, and if blacks were better, you would be at the bottom. I hope you have fun setting back any chance of progress for african americans by making the whole race seem ignorant with a warped sense of reality

Plantation_Cracker said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Plantation_Cracker said...

You expect much from a disciple of "Uncle Louis" or is that "King Louie"? Al's pals are alive and well.

Always first in line to slap Whitey's hand for alleged racial infractions, when they turn out to be entirely untrue--in fact-- concocted--(Duke lacrosse)Homey says nothing and slinks away to his housing project hovel and case of stolen Thunderbird blaming Ronald Reagan and Pat Boone for his sad Black life. Just like he does every day of the week anyway.

Black QB's of the gridiron like McNabb, Culpepper, Randall Cunningham, McNair, of course Vince Young and The Dog Killer too represent a failed effort in lifting up Homey to the superior intellect and mental management of White signal callers like The Manning brothers, Brady, and without question Kurt Warner.

There are exceptions, Warren Moon is one and Doug Williams the other but--again--they are exceptions. There's a reason Philly will never win the Super Bowl with Donovan McNabb and the reason is: Donovan McNabb. Afforded the opportunity to play QB because he is Black, not because it's where he should be positioned.

Such chicanery is a major reason the NFL is a shadow of its former self with the egomaniacal personalities of players like TO, Pacman, Kellen Winslow, Jamal Lewis, Chad Johnson(or is it ocho-cinco)LaDainian "my leg hurts especially during playoffs" Tomlinson, all of whom contribute to a lesser overall product(pro-football)with their anti-team personalities and mediocre play.

The biggest mouth is always the weakest link. That's why they are all Black