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Thursday, October 4, 2007

Broken Hearted

We recently heard some wonderful news.

JuicedSports accumulated a comprehensive listing of the Top 100 most influential blogs in Blogfrica.

Knowing full well that any list of such an undertaking would be amassed with the precision of a Six Sigma Black Belt project, using intensely scientific algorithms and formulaic measures and benchmarks to accurately reflect each blogs influence; we felt assured that this would be the end all and be all definitive listing for sports blogs.

Once and for all, a hierarchy of sports blog could be established. And there would be no argument.

So, with complete faith and trust in the waiting accurate portrait of Blogfrica, we ventured to the list.

#28.

Not bad, thought we, confident that the extensive research involved in the project was a completely accurate depiction of not only our spot, but all spots on the list.

Our trust was complete. As was our measurement of our self worth, based on the list.

And then....and then we were made aware of.....this... from We Rite Goode:

10/2 Update: After some readers cried foul that 28th most "influencial" blog--Nyjer Please--is inconveniently defunct, while the well-read Nation of Islam Sportsblog was excluded from the list, Juiced bowed to critics and updated the rankings. Well, updated the rankings is a bit of a stretch...more like swapped in NOIS and removed Nyjer Please at number 28 overall. Now, I know what you're thinking...but it makes perfect sense--as those of us around the blogosphere know, Nyjer Please and NOIS blog have exactly the same amount of influence! It really is amazing, given that the blogs are written in completely different styles and focus on different topics, but I totally trust the two equally.

WHAT?!

Suddenly, our morning coffee lost its taste. A cloud blocked the sun. And our self worth was now at Britney Spears levels.

How could this be?

Swapped one for another with no controlled and documented process to assess the impact it would have on the entire listing?

And, what of swapping out a defunct blog for NOIS? It sends a message that NOIS has all the influence of a blog that doesn't exist!

Our self worth plummeted further.

And what of the 72 blogs ranked below NOIS?

Now, they are less influential than a blog that is as influential as a blog that doesn't exist.

And what of those blogs ranked ahead of NOIS?

They are now only more influential than a blog that is of less influence than a blog that no longer exist.

Suddenly, what seemed a brilliant, scientific and comprehensive undertaking has become a metaphorical pejorative aimed at Blogfrica in general.

According to Juiced Sports, blogs have no influence.


Perhaps the most disheartening aspect of the 'switch' is that NOIS was placed in a position held by a blog which, if the name is read quickly, could be mistaken for 'nigger, please!'.

The message to Blogfrica couldn't be louder.

15 comments:

Big Daddy Drew said...

I guess all black blogs look alike to them.

RAYYYYYY-CESSSSST!

ultrasound tech said...

what's juiced sports?

Dave the Wave said...

"Big Daddy Drew said... "

aww, look!

if it isn't unthinking jewnority's life partner showing his skirt...

Oops Pow Surprise said...

What's "juicedsports?" Dead to us, Brother Ultrasound. That's what it is.

DigitalHeadbutt said...

What then does the ranking say about the blog on which it was published? It is the kind of Paradox thats blows up circuitry and floods you inbox with infinite money offers from Nigerian businessmen.

Dave the Wave said...

"Nigerian businessmen"

thats an oxymoron.

Doctor Dribbles said...

Let me get this straight: Your post doesn't fawn, spend time navel-gazing, or make some lame joke about bribing the judges?

I want to say my faith in bloggers' self-respect and critical thinking skills has been restored, but can't...

...because how could anyone ever doubt NOIS? Take note, blogosphere--Deadspin and DC Sports Bog may ignore them, Mottram may suggest alternatives, but this is how truly influential blogs acknowledge rankings of questionable credulity: They put 'em in their place.

(And Home Run Derby--you're on notice.)

madd hatter said...

how can they not have nois in the top 10???

you coined the phrase blogfrica and i have seen that on MANY blogs...if that ain't influence...

Lil John's Pimp Cup said...

BTW... there are other questions to be asked about that list.

Blog Maverick is not even a fucking sports blog!

Martin said...

Sir, much like we have to rerank college QB, coaches, and teams to account for the white bias, will NOISb be putting together a list of the top blogs that are without WHITE bias?

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"will NOISb be putting together a list of the top blogs that are without WHITE bias?"

Sir, we'd have to sift through all types of blogs to determine such a thing.

Frankly, after reading our own, most fall short...we'd never have the stamina to drudge through them...

Martin said...

"Sir, we'd have to sift through all types of blogs to determine such a thing."

Sir, allow me to attempt (I cannot master the html code developed by white programers, sir, so bear with me):

1. NOISb

2. Alfred Charles Sharpton (http://www.al-sharpton.com/)

3. Jesse Louis Jackson (http://www.freepress.net/actionnetwork/blog/403)

4. Cincinnati Black Blog
(http://blackcincinnati.blogspot.com/)

5. Dikembe Mutombo Blog
(http://www.dmf.org/news.php)

6. Wayne Brady Blog
(http://www.waynebrady.com/)

7. Isiah Thomas Blog
(http://www.maxim.com/IsiahThomasPickupLines/articles/6853.aspx?src=tst118:MKd)

8. Dave the Wave Blog
(http://www.redneckramblings.com/)

censored said...

Nois..you continue to be such a bore...with all the colorful recent sports news you have yet to put your twisted spin on, why would you write such a meaningless post? Here's a suggestion...go shoot up some steroids with marion jones, then go smoke up with travis henry and then go and force yourself on some sisters with Isiah Thomas...in the very least you could get an interesting post out of it....on second thought we wouldnt need another post on how it is whitey's fault for all your wrongdoings.

lgf said...

censored,

why the hostility, white boy?

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"Nois..you continue to be such a bore"

Sir, seems our boring ways stimulate insightful comments from you. And we still get at least an hour a day from you on our site.

Boring indeed.