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Tuesday, April 24, 2007

Eva Longoria: Hates Sick Africans

Apparently, Dikembe Mutombo had been working with the NBA to sanction an NBA all-star game in Paris, with proceeds benefiting a hospital Mutombo had donated in the Congo.

The plan was to have a French team, lead by Tony Parker play against a team of NBA'ers, lead by Yao Ming.

One problem. Parker will be marrying Eva Longoria, who apparently feels her little honeymoon is more important than curing diseases in Africa. Lord knows she probably NEVER has the chance to go on relaxing trips with Parker.

"Tony is going to be on the honeymoon, and the French Federation says if Tony Parker will not play, the game cannot happen," Mutombo said. "Everybody said yes, but Tony cannot leave the honeymoon to come to play. I don't know his fiancée, so I don't know how to talk to her."

Well, Dikembe, we'd suggest talking to her just like Parker does, "Yes, ma'am, whatever you say, ma'am."

Just in:

Doug Christie says Parker is whipp-ed!


Anonymous said...

What are y'all smoking over there at the Masjid? Ground up pork rinds???

I don't think this is business, IT'S PERSONAL: it's the man's HONEYMOON, for crying out loud!

You expect a woman to cut her honeymoon short (one of the most important rituals, aside from the wedding and reception)? I understand that there may be more important events going on but the French Federation should just start asking around NOW.


nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"You expect a woman to cut her honeymoon short "

Ma'am, we don't expect a woman to cut her honeymoon off short. We know it isn't in her nature.

We do expect her husband to cut it off for her.

Can I get an "allahu akhbar", brothers?

Martin said...



Sir, Mirch?

"I don't know his fiancée, so I don't know how to talk to her."

Wouldn't 'Who wants to sex Mutombo?' be appropriate?

Anonymous said...


Anonymous said...

Dikembe just needs to tell the greedy little chihuahua that he's handing out gift bags. she'll personally fly Tony there on her broomstick. and, of course she wants to sex Mutumbo!

Last year there was a wire news story that Evita ordered her boo not to have a bachelor's party (Spurs teammates were planning it).

is there rehab for ill-considered engagements? intervention for Mr. Parker, stat!

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...


Sir, sorry the commentary isn't up to your obvious standards.

*crickets*, how biting and witty!

May we use it sometime?

nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"is there rehab for ill-considered engagements? "

Sir, yes....groupies.

the butler said...

First of all, that game would have SUCKED!

A "French team"...

That is just too funny.

I'll make sure to set my Tivo for that one.

There's gotta be a better way to raise money for Africans.

Anonymous said...

""is there rehab for ill-considered engagements? "

Sir, yes....groupies."


i'm a ma'am :-)

and, yes, if it were my honeymoon i'd insist he go and demand that he take me.


nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"i'm a ma'am :-)"

Ma'am, when one posts anonymously, we use sir.

It' just what we do.

Anonymous said...

p.s. and, btw, yeah, why would anyone want to go to Paris during their honeymoon?! no romance there.

i can't stand the sight of her


nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"i can't stand the sight of her"

Ma'am, are holding a torch for Tony P?

Anonymous said...


thanks for the kind explanation. no worries - i get it. i'm just too lazy to set up account. trying to stay off the devil's grid.


Anonymous said...


no. as we converse, i'm wearing the jersey of the immortal #21


nation_of_islam_sportsblog said...

"trying to stay off the devil's grid."

Ma'am, don't let the devil's grid intimidate you.

You don't have to give him real information.

Besides, you are protected on this page.

Righteousness can be blinding.