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Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Miami Dolphins: Solve QB Problem, Beat Pats

Certainly, one of the biggest upsets of the weekend past in the NFL was the Miami Dolphins drubbing of the formerly title contending Patriots.

While most anticipated that eventually the New England offense would sputter under the direction of a caucasian promoted to first string having not started a football game since High School; few anticipated that the Dolphins would find the combination to unlock the Patriot defense.

First, we must give credit where credit is due. The Dolphins came in with a brilliant scheme. The coaching staff clearly realized that up to this point in the season they had been allowing their own philosophies and play drawing to get in the way. Therefore, they made two key adjustments.

One, they simplified the offense.

Two, they realized that shoulder-less Chad Pennington was simply a road bump in the way of getting the ball from center to someone who could make something happen. So, in the most proficient of maneuvers, they cut out the middle man, and got the ball directly to the most efficient passer on the team: Running Back-turned-Negro QB Ronnie Brown.

RB/Negro QB Brown devastated the Patriot defense with his slashing running out of the shotgun formation. We heard the announcers refer to it as the 'Arkansas single wing'. Clearly, this was an effort to mitigate Brown's ascension to the role of Negro QB, and to try to shackle him to running back.

Well, it won't work. It won't work because the numbers don't lie. Brown emerged from the game with a gaudy 158 QB rating. Clearly cementing himself as the best passer on the team.

As the mainstream media and NFL do their best to eradicate the emergence of young, Negro QBs (Vince, Tarvaris and JaMarcus); it will be interesting to see how they conspire to somehow confine Negro QB Ronnie Brown to the role of running back.

Clearly, the white owners and mainstream media understand that the Negro long ago usurped the role of chief rusher on the grid iron. Using superior speed, quickness, stamina, explosiveness, vision and desire to banish the white running back to the history books.

Now, in return, the white conspirators are using that same victory of ability to enslave the Negro to the position.

Brown clearly has beaten out Pennington for the starting QB job in Miami.

Unfortunately, we will now watch as he is imprisoned in the RB position. The QB position, dangled in front of him like freedom to a slave. Then, quickly denied. As success at RB drags him back like a chain tied to the bumper of a pick up truck.

And, this is the hand the Negro in the NFL is dealt.

There are 11 positions on each side of the ball. And, Brown can only play one at a time.

Unfortunately, the same is true for Chad Pennington.

And the team already has a field goal holder on the roster.


RighteousReasoner said...


It is not the white QB we must defeat.

It is the "white Muslim"

Another forked-tongue devil spewing nonsense.

Reverend Paul Revere said...

If the slavedrivers in Miami had any sense, they would surely start Brown and qb and Ricky at RB.

Dave the Wave said...

you forgot to mention that Pennington threw for 17-20...not a bad day.


Andrew said...

Is this blog supposed to be witty and over-the-top to make a point, or is it meant to be taken seriously? I'm sure I'm out of touch, but its a real question - I really can't tell.

ZEKE said...

" I really can't tell."

then you are dumber than you look.

Big Man said...

Y'all see this story about Cedric Benson?

Dirty Sanchez said...

If by Negro QB you mean to give the ball to the aforementioned Negro and not let him throw it, then I do believe there is a chance for success.

If Vince, Tarvaris, and JaMarcus were only allowed to run with the ball, I think their value (and QB ratings) would greatly improve.

Dave the Wave said...


zeke is right, this dude must be a moron if he thinks this jig shit is witty.

Avonte Mixon said...

"If by Negro QB you mean to give the ball to the aforementioned Negro and not let him throw it"

Then Carson Palmer and Matt Hasselbeck must be Negro QB's.

Andrew said...

thanks for the useful feedback zeke, maybe I was giving the authors too much credit.

ctgriff10 said...

"If Vince, Tarvaris, and JaMarcus were only allowed to run with the ball, I think their value (and QB ratings) would greatly improve."

Then why don't they just become running backs? They've got decent speed and 2 out of the 3(i haven't seen russell play) can't throw for shit, so it makes sense

RighteousReasoner said...

We at the NOIsb got all excited when we saw Mississippi had defeated overrated, media-hyped honkey Tim Tebow with a QB named Jevan Snead...but was just another palefaced honkey masquerading as a Negro. What we saw as sure fodder for Our Righteous Teachings vanished from before our eyes.

His parents attempt at a Negro inspired name is the closest he'll ever be to the superior, Original QB.

MCBias said...

You are so right--and don't forget LT in San Diego! Man can run, catch AND throw!

In conclusion, I missed reading this site immensely. It's been too long!