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Wednesday, January 7, 2009

Rick Reilly is Right: Utah is National Champ

Generally, we perceive Rick Reilly's work since moving to ESPN.com to be lazy, boring, unfunny, ill-conceived, cliche, trite, uncreative, untimely, irrelevant and overall.....unnecessary.

We use his column as a barometer for what subjects to stay away from. A general rule: if Reilly is keying about it, it is either ancient news or not news.

How Reilly gets a 7 figure contract while none of our contributors can get so much as a corner in AOL's Fanhouse is beyond ponderance.

Anyway, sometimes storms catch us off guard, even though we tally the readings of the barometer.

Reilly's most recent cliche infested ramble anointed Utah as his national champion. Being of sound mind, we can generally pick apart any argument that Reilly makes and clearly show that siding with him is akin to believing we can invest a trillion dollars in the economy and do it while implementing a middle class tax cut. It's just plain foolish to take his point of view.

Well, we are fools.

Reilly is one hundred percent correct in believing that the BCS title game between Florida and Oklahoma is an affront to college football fans everywhere. That it is a fraud and a conspiracy. That it is a slap in the face to the competitive interests of the sport.

Reilly blames it on greed. On the unwillingness of BCS conferences to spread the wealth around a little.

Uh-oh. The barometer is showing a rising pressure.

While Reilly's conclusion is spot on; his arrival to correctness seems to be happenstance.

Yes, Utah deserves to be National Champion.

No, greed and conspiracy to exclude non-BCS teams from the pot of gold is NOT why they aren't in the title game.

Clearly, the painstakingly obvious reason must have been beyond the sleepy eyed view of the lethargic minded Reilly.

Utah has a Negro QB.

Since the installation of the BCS system, only two teams (1998 Tennessee and 2005 Texas) were generalled by Negro QB's to championships. Both of those teams were major players in major conferences, and undefeated. There was no possible way to exclude the teams from the title game.

Along comes a MWC team with a Negro QB. What better way to send a message to non-BCS schools that if you choose to align yourselves with Negro QB's, you will not be invited to the big party?

The effort is two fold. It will stop non-BCS schools from gaining the requisite competitive edge offered by having a Negro QB, which in turn will cement the dominance of BCS teams. And it also will cut down on the Negro QB pool of available draftees for the NFL. Saving jobs for white QB's.

Clearly, in Reilly's haste to crown Utah as his national champions, Reilly missed the crystal clear conspiracy that was right under his nose. Instead, Reilly went with money as the devil in this instance.

Haven't we all realized by now that green is not the color of evil?

Evil is the absence of color.

White.

And Reilly's columns are the absence of relevance.

Also white.

39 comments:

Paul Mitchell said...

The only reason that Utah is not National Champion is that they do not play in the TWO major conferences.

And because currently, the Negro quarterback National Champion percentage equals the Negro National percentage. 2 of 13.

Get to dismantling those quotas, NOIS.

Foxxy Brown said...

why do you all continue to read these Reilly, Simmons and Whitlock people? and keep the sound turned during Monday night football?

/non-masochist

Foxxy Brown said...

* turned on

Dave the Wave said...

"turned on"

You been reading my comments again, aintya, you sultry negress you..getting all wet, are you!

Foxxy Brown said...

ok, that one was actually borderline funny

lgf said...

"ok, that one was actually borderline funny"

It most certainly was not.

Foxxy Brown said...

i was in a good mood this morning, lgf.

Foxxy Brown said...

partly because, for the first time ever, what he said was at least responsive to what i wrote . . .

Anonymous said...

so jason cambell and auburn were left out because cambell is a black qb?
this is a joke right. wake up. let it go. move on. nobody cares what color a player is. no rational person that is. the best man gets the job.
do you really think color is an issue at qb? those days are gone.
if a white person even whispers this kind of thought to the media his or her career is over. finished. that fat fucking dickhead rush limbaugh got his ass run out of sports. now he is back selling that propaganda to the dull and narrow minded.
as far as reilly, well,reilly is a tool. not because he is white. he is a tool because he is a TOOL. what is your motive? do you want racism to grow stronger? or can you look at things with out seeing color or race? and by the way, evil comes in all colors.

Paul Mitchell said...

Holy shit, NOIS, you got chastized by Mike Sterling of the Marina del Rey Sterlings. Not just some ORDINARY Matt Sterling.

Matt, you should change your name to Whitey McWhitenstein or something.

Anonymous said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Anonymous said...

word up 2 dogs, maybe you should change your name to three dogs

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Tim Donaghy said...

You're a nutcase!

ritter said...

so it's because of the negro quarterback. wow. why not about the negro offensive linemen or the negro safety. get a life. the 1800's are over. move on...dumb fuks.

Anonymous said...

This blog is great. no really.

Dirty Sanchez said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Dirty Sanchez said...

NOISB must have received a nice paycheck back in January because he hasn't been to work since.

Negro rich indeed.

RighteousReasoner said...

Sir, the hefty stimulus check presented to Us by Negro Savior Reverend Barack Obama has indeed left us no more need to impart Our Righteous Knowledge on the stupid ones.

If you'll join Us, We will be partying in your town shortly, complete with fully nude Negresses and all the swine you can eat.

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