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Wednesday, January 31, 2007

Tank Johnson: A Model of Grace Under Fire

Super Bowl week is a week rife with hype and hyperbole. When the story ON the field isn't all that interesting, like this year (Peyton Manning? YAWN...da Bears Defense? Wake me up when the game is over), leave it to the mainstream media to find a player or "story" to pump up. And 9 times out of 10 it is some misrepresentation of the behavior of a Negro athlete (see: Lewis, Ray or Robinson, Eugene, et al..).

Enter Terry "Tank" Johnson, the unfortunate circumstances surrounding his bodyguards untimely demise and the confusion behind his possessing weapons he felt were a necessity to protect his family, have opened the door to they type of story the mainstream media uses to ensure that young Negroes are continually reminded that no matter how hard they work, they will be continually pushed down.

On, this is the attitude that was exhibited toward Terry Johnson:

"After seeing Johnson at Media Day, I just have one question -- why does he even need a bodyguard or guns? Who would mess with this 6-foot-3, 300-pound guy? My question to you: Should Johnson be allowed to play in the Super Bowl?"

A staggering suggestion. Ban the man from the Super Bowl for being a large Negro who lives in white America; and fears for his life so much so that he is compelled to hire protection and own fire arms? The author of this inadvertently gives us a clear reason as to why Mr. Johnson needed a bodyguard and fire arms: Because White America hates him and will stop at nothing to prevent him from reaching his dream of playing football at the highest level.

"His bodyguard, Willie Posey, was shot and killed two days later during an early morning fight at a nightclub in Chicago, where Johnson was present. Oh yeah, all this happened while Johnson was on probation. So how does Johnson explain this during Media Day? He says the media have "overblown" the story, and that it's the media's job to "hype the hot story." The NFL should ban him from playing in the game just for those comments."

i) Is the implication that somehow Mr. Johnson was involved in the shooting? It is no crime to be present at the locale of a murder, and to our knowledge law enforcement has made no suggestion that Mr. Johnson is a suspect. Yet, the author emphasizes Johnson's presence.

ii) Johnson's most recent run in with the law certainly did happen while he was on probation. Is this relevent to the piece? Or is this pointed out to "hype" the details of Johnson's previous misunderstandings with the law?

iii) Ban Mr. Johnson from the Super Bowl for his comments defending himself? Shall we also ban Mr. Johnson from reading and writing and allow that the only words that cross his lips are, "Yas sah, Massah."

The author's own piece completely supports Johnson's contention! Calling to ban him for his comments or not to let him play, despite the COURTS not having a problem with it, is HYPE and is OVERBLOWING things. Subtley referencing Mr. Johnson's presence at building in which Mr. Posey was murdered is the worst kind of conjecturous hype possible.

All we at NOIS can do is thank Mr. Johnson for his grace under pressure and for being a role model for young Negroes, even in the face of hateful attacks by the likes of's Jemele Hill.

"Johnson admonished the media for labeling him a thug, even though he wore dark sunglasses, a wave cap and a diamond earring to media day."

Oh, Ms. Hill, we will pray that you overcome your self loathing and understand that there is nothing wrong or "thuggish" when a young Negro male is wearing sunglasses in sunny Miami; trying to get his hair right for the evening festivities and sporting the requisite young millionaire bling in his ear. We would imagine that a young Negro lady such as Ms. Hill would be all up under Mr. Johnson at the club. But clearly, when she is on the clock with picking up that heavy paycheck, she feels the need to put on the appropriate aires and affectations.

"During Johnson's media session, I couldn't help but think of one of my favorite Dave Chappelle jokes. Chappelle warned us not to judge women who wear provocative clothing. "She's not a whore," Chappelle said. "But she is wearing a whore's uniform."

Again, Ms. Hill, you are the recipient of our heartfelt prayers. And we tell you this: Next time you feel like you have been stereotyped or are the victim of racism, don't come crying to us! "Hey, folks, look at the young female Negro columnist at; bet she loves chicken and watermellon! She must, she's "wearing the uniform"."

We will leave this on a positive note, with the insightful and heartfelt words of our young rolemodel, Mr. Johnson:

"I felt like the world was coming on top of my head. At the same time, as a faithful Christian, you have to continue to stick to the power of prayer because when times is bad, you have to continue to do what's important and what got you there. It might not change right now. It might not change tomorrow. It might not change a month from now. If you continue to pray, continue to look forward to the better things in life, it'll come out."

And we know, Mr. Johnson, times is bad. But your sincerity and hard work will pay off. Keep doing what got you here. It's working wonderfully so far and will lead to your just rewards.

Tuesday, January 30, 2007

Spread of College "Black Face" Parties

Now, doesn't George look better?

Although this is a sports blog, occasionally an incident (or several incidents) may take place that are not directly relateable to the world of sports; but, we feel a social responsibility to comment.

Not long ago the nation joined together in a sign of unity and remembrance of the positive contributions of one Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Across the wide spectrum of the rainbow, Americans joined hands and hugged each other in deference to the message related through the words and life of Dr. King. While this was going on, some students on college campuses across the nation decided to celebrate Dr. King's vision in their own, unique way: By painting their faces black and bringing to life any negative stereotype of the Negro that they could.

Students at UConn, Tarleton State and Clemson posted pictures on various websites of the frivolous and care free "black face parties" they hosted to commemorate Dr. King and to acknowledge the short time until the beginning of February and Black History Month.

Certainly, sensitive members of the student communities and campuses that hosted these parties voiced displeasure and cried racism and all the other usual vocal protests that one offers when offended.

Well, we at the NOIS would like to offer an alternative view and we would like to encourage future parties on ALL campuses.

Ranneice McDonald, another Clemson student, said she saw nothing funny about it.

"People painted themselves black. Put fake butts inside their pants to signify the big booty black-girl thing. Fake gold teeth in their mouths caps and jerseys -- depicted us as wearing such things as that are disgusting to me. It's disgusting. It makes me sick to my stomach," McDonald said.

While the descriptive of the party may have hurt Ranneice's feelings; we'd like to suggest that ALL white people please paint their faces black at ALL times. It is high time you people showed us the respect and love we deserve. What better way than to cover your pasty, offensively devoid of color skin? Black face would effectively hide that sickly hue that most whites carry. You would be much more palatable to view.

Additionally, we see NOTHING wrong with, and invite ALL white women to sport fake butts. Adding some humps to your otherwise board flat derrieres would be a welcome and comforting gesture. It is the least you can offer the Negro after 400 years of suppression, oppression and repression.

As for the jerseys and ball caps. Again, we'd rather see you in that than J. Crew and Aberfaggie.

The gold fronts; we can do without. To go that far would be racist.

Monday, January 29, 2007

First Call: Mail

Esteemed readers, we have received a a fairly voluminous sampling of inquiries, statements, feedback and rantings from some of you.

In an effort to share some of the most interesting, maddening, intelligent and illiterate pieces; we will be running a post with the very best that we have received.

In anticipation of such, we would like to solicit more contributions. If you have an inquiry, statement, some feedback or some such contributions, please write our editor at:

Thank you in advance, and As-Salaam-Alaikum.

The Real Super Bowl Press Conference

The mainstream reporters shuffled out of the press conference, armed with pleasant and thoughtful quotes from Coach Dungy. Things like, "it's an honor to represent black coaches"; "I am proud of all our team has accomplished this year"; "I had every confidence in Peyton to come through for this team".

Dungy has been saying the right things and presenting the right image for years. Carefully constructing that non-threatening, thoughtful and inherently respectful persona that has led to a nice tenure as an NFL head coach. We see him on TV after games, a balanced personality delivering meticulously crafted orations intended to ensure that people understand that he is a football coach first and foremost, that his love of the game and love of his team is something that is completely separate from the color of his skin or the curliness of his hair.

Now that he has reached the pinnacle of his profession, Coach Dungy can finally let his hair down, so to speak.

"Dawg, we fittin' to show da Bears what they made of, fo' real!"

"Tell Lovie he best not to come up in here wit dat weak azz O an' shit! We not playin', you seen how my D been eatin' teams up, right? I know you see us. We right HERR! Don't even act like you cain't see!"

"Urlacher? What I think 'bout Urlacher? Yo, da boy a'ight. He play a pretty tight game. Ain't no Ray Lewis, but da boy can bawl on any given Sunday. We a'see what he got fo' us. Eh, like I sayd, da boy can play and I ainna 'boutta give him mo' locker room mot'vation dan he need. It up to Lovie to get him redd ta play, not me."

"Naw, dawg. Hell to da naw. Two week off ain't nuttin but a thang. No rust. No loss of m'mentum. Some our old guys like Saturday an Marvin be gettin' mad rest an' is jus' rechargin'. Dey fittin' to bring it real down in the MIA come Sundy, ya heard!"

"Eh, well, den that how it gonna be. Black coach versus black coach. And you can tell Whitlock: Get ya pen ready, dawg, cause'a see some black on black violence. And dat's REAL TALK, dawg..."

"Man, I ain't even gonna mess 'round wit dat type a question. If ya think Peyton shot his load las' week and ain't showin' up this week...well, dawg, I ain't got nuthin' fo' ya. You entitled to ya opinion an' can aks whateveh type question ya wants to. But on the real, if ya think I aintta have my boys hungry and figthin' ta win...well, don't know me. You might see me in the street, but nigga you don't know me..."

Quick Shout To The Queen

Backed up with a "determination" of hottentotian proportions, Serena was unstoppable downunder.

Unseeded and basically an afterthought at the start of this year's Aussie Open, Serena Williams was written off as being "out of shape" and disinterested in tennis.

Well, looks like the young Negress gets the last laugh.

After pummelling top-ranked Maria Sharapova, Ms. Serena has proven once again that the original human is the superior athlete in any and all circumstances. Sharapova is the top female tennis player in the world? Well, one supposes that should now be prefaced by "white".

Ms. Serena certainly did not back into this title. She played a well-rounded game and her incredible effort led to her taking home the trophy and accompanying championship booty. Ms. Serena displayed the heart of a champion, even coming from behind when she was trailing one match. Which in hind sight, probably gave her the confidence to be able to come out on top in the end.

It is becoming more and more apparent: Segregation in sports might be the only alternative for white athletes; who are rapidly becoming irrelevant doormats in most sports.

Friday, January 26, 2007

Be Careful Out There: White Race Car Drivers On Crime Spree

While the white dominated media is busy castigating the mischievous young Negro men of the Cincinnati Bengals, who have shown an over exuberance for a good time and have made a few understandable, but poor, decisions: We urge our readers to be careful out there!

A new scourge of lawlessness has arisen, and probably won't get much coverage in mainstream, white media.

NASCAR and Indy car driving are gems of the white sports world. Little athletic ability or talent is needed. Simply find a sponsor willing to pay your bills, and BOOM; you are a race driver. The common man aspect of this is probably what is so appealing to the average red neck and Natural Lite drinker. While watching out of shape, unathletic drivers spend hours turning left, the average fan of this sport can look over at his buddy Jim Bob and say, "Boy, howdy! We might could probably be some race car drivers, I reckon."

Well, race car drivers have proven to be a dangerous, law avoiding lot; hiding behind the protection of a friendly media and an ignorant fan base. Today saw reports of a run of terror unmatched in the world of sports.

First, a driver named Al Unser Jr., who has won some racing event held in the midwest (or something) let loose with what is tantamount to a personal assault on the state of Nevada.

The second incident involved urination and general snarky wiseassery from the mouth of a young, crackerjack driver. The snarky wiseassery was from the mouth; the urnination was not.

We are sure these incidents will be burried beneath reports of Chris Henry receiving a measly two days in jail for something which was clearly a misunderstanding.

Readers of NOIS: Be careful out there.

Who Said It?

Match the "quote" with the person that might have said it.

Topic: "I like big butts and I cannot lie"

a) My buddy, House, emailed me the other day. He suggested that we claim Serena Williams off the waiver wire for our fantasy tennis team. If only the Sportsgal had back like that. I'd wax it like Ralph Macchio in "The Karate Kid". Good times!

b) I am gonna knit Sir Mixalot a clown suit and floppy shoes. His ridiculous rhymes about big booties are holding black folks down. Consider yourself warned, bojangler!

c) Allow me to be the first person in Illinois, if not all humankind, to find fault with big butts. That is...unless they are in a locker room attached to a sexy male athlete.

d) We ordinarily wouldn't bring this up; but, yeah, we'd like to see a whole lot more rumpshaking out there, so you know, feel free to leave us a tip if you have access to that sort of thing.

e) Biggest. Booty. Ever.

1) Dan Shanoff
2) Jay Mariotti
3) Jason Whitlock
4) Bill Simmons
5) Will Leitch (deadspin)

Thursday, January 25, 2007

So, This Is What It's Come To?

Not long ago, we posted on here that we hoped the "sport" of hockey would be left like road kill; a bleeding carcass on the side of the road, rotting in the sun as vultures circled over. Apparently, last night, something big happened in the world of hockey. Unbeknownst to most sports followers and ignored by almost any media outlet of consequence, a match up of the very best "athletes" hockey has to offer took place in Dallas, on the Versus "network". And you know what? This is proof that our prayers have been answered.

We defy the casual sports fan to name 5 players in the game. The handful of diehard hockey officiandos will certainly be able to do so. But we are talking about the average sports fan, not the fan that actually believes Versus is a viable network. It can't be done! This is further proof that hockey is at best a fringe sport and an area of refuge for the "athlete" that can not compete on solid ground with the original human.

Ask the casual sports fan to name five football pro bowlers. Name five basketball all stars. Not a problem. Even 5 baseball all stars is simple. Interesting, isn't it. Football and basketball, the sports completely dominated by the Negro athlete are the most followed. Again, a reflection that even the caucasian sports follower recognizes that without the Negro athlete, a sport is not a viable sport (read: hockey).

Clearly, with hockey's demise almost complete, the caucasian athlete may well be left without a game to call his own. Young white children may be left without role models. We believe that all children need role models and all children can benefit from participating in athletics. Therefore, we graciously offer up a role model and a sport suitable for the white athlete. A sport that relies less on athleticism and competition and moreso on creativity and subjective scoring.

The quintessential white male athlete of the 21st Century:

Figure skating will give caucasian males an arena in which they can compete in a "sport" on skates, wear fancy outfits with gloves and be completely sheltered from the threat of competition from Negro athletes. It's essentially hockey, but with a viable TV audience.

So, to all the white parents out there: Go sign up for some ice time and get your boys fitted for their costumes. It's time to lace up the skates and start producing some white male "athletes".

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Serena Williams: In Perfect Shape

For weeks leading up to the Australian Open, we have heard that Serena Williams is out of shape and disinterested in tennis. She was unseeded and the talking heads of the the chalk line white world of tennis dismissed her as a non-factor in the coming event. When will you people learn?

Out of shape? The thick thighs and bouncing hindquarters of the diva of the hard court certainly are not typical of the flat, blanched fundament of your Caucasian tennis bunny. Hips more succulent than the most perfectly prepared dinner entre. A thin, almost miniscule waist providing the perfect juxtaposition between that equine like lower half and those rotund glandulars that sway to-and-fro from her chest with every step the queen of the court takes. All packaged within a perfectly form fitting and supportively tight tennis garment. Usually of her own design.

Out of shape? Since when is a coke bottle figure out of shape? Since when is a voluptuous, nubile body not the ideal shape? What Nubian female hating, asexual miscreant determined this?

Reaching the semi's of a Grand Slam event, while practicing little and generally diverting her attention to other interests, while at the same time growing into the body of a real woman is only further cementation of the fact that Serena Williams is the greatest tennis player ever to set foot on the court.

From any angle, her game is tops. As is her bottom.

Tuesday, January 23, 2007

The Truth: Parcell's Retirement Means Cowboys Success

Symbolic of the old whipmaster mentality, Bill Parcells remained an eye sore reminder of an era long gone and a coaching method with an expired shelf life. Rotund and grouchy, Parcells was belligerent towards the press, players, owners, fans, family, cheerleaders, trainers, passers by on the street, waitresses, flight attendants, bartenders, doctors, lawyers, teachers, children, infants and retirees. The only time Parcells smiled or was amicable, was feeding time.

Considered a genius for "leading" two Super Bowl champion Giants teams, Parcells was supposedly going to bring that genius to Dallas and reinfuse that storied franchise. The only problem: Parcells was poison in the locker room.

Hear it from the lips of the Negro gladiator. The man that gave his all for victory. Terrell Owens graciously kept his mouth closed like a good soldier for most of the season (certainly his frustration with the situation lead to a few voicings of displeasure, but that is understandable), but now that the scenario has played out and Parcells is departing, the tight lipped Owens can reveal what really went down:

"T.O. reportedly said that Parcells created an unhealthy locker room environment, claiming the legendary coach would sometimes not talk to him for months. What more, Parcells did not offer Owens any words of encouragement following his accidental overdose."

Interesting, to say the least. We know that Drew Bledsoe had some differences with Parcells and even lost his starting job. But no reports exist of Parcells ignoring his presence or symbolically endorsing his demise by not encouraging him. And, despite the fact that Owens was grossly underused and ineffectively game planned; Owens still put up his best numbers in the past 5 years. Underachiever? Certainly not! A gladiator that fought through injury (he just completed off season surgery for that finger) and horrendous offensive game plans to still remain one of the elite receivers in the league. Add in the locker room poison and venomous silence directed towards him by Parcells, and you have what may well have been the most heroic individual efforts the NFL has yet seen.

One must wonder if Parcells would have been so overtly contemptuous with his silence and conducted the obvious sabotage attempts (through game plans) of Owens if TO had been a white player. How can one not wonder?

Owens was willing to try new approaches this season. He started the year ready to open a new chapter in his career, but that fresh attitude and open mindedness was not reciprocated:

""Coming into this season and this situation, I wanted to be positive," Owens told the Star-Telegram. "When I talked to him for the first time we left an impression on each other. I still think he is a great guy. But he is like my grandmother. You love the person, but they are stuck in their old-school ways. You can't move them from their way of thought."

Once again, we see an example of a young, progressive thinking Negro stifled by an ancient mindset. It should be evident to all that those few occasions that TO gave into frustration and said things that the press completely misrepresented as being detrimental to the team were simply manifestations of his willingness and desire to help change the mindset of the team and further progress; to bring it into the 21st century and to WIN. Any other interpretation of his actions is simply an attempt to force the young Negro warrior to stand pat and accept the whippings of an outdated philosophy.

Parcells' "retirement" is akin to the emancipation of Terrell Owens:

"I am just hoping his retirement brings promise to what the team has to offer," Owens said. "This past year was a big letdown. On paper we were as good as anybody we played against every week. The end result didn't show that. Our play was not indicative of what we could have done. What we should have done. Hopefully, the owner will hire a coach to take the team to the next level."

Football fans everywhere are hoping that Jerry Jones does the right thing and brings in a coach that will set Owens free. A coach that will allow TO to flourish and not let the coach's ego interfere to the point that his efforts to clip TO's wings destroy the team from the inside out.

Parcells' willingness to leave is a step in the right direction. It is an open admission that his style, philosophy and outlook is outdated. Additionally, it is symbolic of corroboration to TO's view that Parcells poisoned the locker room and the team.

The NOIS accepts Parcells apology, through retirement, and what can only be construed as an accompanying admission that he has been the harbinger of strife and discord amongst the Cowboys.

Steelers: First Step Towards Next Ring?

Following the lead of this year's Super Bowl participants, the Pittsburgh Steelers have decided that the most direct path back to the top of the football heap is under the direction of a Negro head coach.

Some say it is an example of the progress that the NFL has made in minority hiring. Some are thrilled to see that the Rooney family is implementing adherence to the so called "Rooney Rule". The reality is: The NFL is NOT making progress in hiring minorities and the Rooney family could care less about rules. Winning. That is what it is about. And teams are now confronted with the reality that if you give a Negro coach the same type of situation and infrastructure to succeed that white coaches get, the results will be victories and post season accolades.

Folks will say, look at Arizona and Oakland; they had Negro coaches and had lousy teams. Yes, so true. But those jobs are symptomatic of most of the jobs that had been given to Negro coaches in the past. No win situations. Owners that were out of touch with the game and reality. Or, as in Cleveland with Romeo Crennell, a hopeless rebuilding job. Anytime a plumb job at a solid organization has been open, the Negro coach is quickly interviewed to document compliance with the rule (or in some cases they don't even bother). But in Pittsburgh, the will to win was too much.

In their own division, the Steelers watched Cincinatti give Marvin Lewis the support necessary to turn that franchise around. Give the Rooney family credit for not just watching, but learning and understanding that the key to success is going with the best man for the job. And in most cases, that is the original human.

Times are no longer what they were, and we are seeing the old white coach not be able to adjust and get the most out of his players. The ancient Marty Schottenheimer once again failed miserably in the playoffs. Bill Parcells has chosen to move to the old folks home after realizing that the energy and desire to win of the Negro athlete was something he could not match. Joe Gibbs return to the game has been an exercise in futility. Mike Holmgren just can't win the big one in Seattle. The Philadelphia Eagles are one Negro head coach away from a championship. Mark it down.

The only impediment to the Steelers' return to the top might be this: ownership is dictating who stays on the coaching staff.

So, if Mike Tomlin is not successful, we can only blame the old white coordinators that ownership chose to force on him.

Monday, January 22, 2007

See You In Miami!

Not only have Tony Dungy and Lovie Smith blown-up the conspiracy to rid the NFL of Negro head coaches, but both men have proven that they must now be mentioned in the same breath as other great QB mentors like Bill Walsh.

We documented earlier in our bulletproof post detailing the conspiracy to derail the strides made in hiring Negro head coaches, that Tony Dungy was the one coach that was particularly safe. As the "non-threatening" Negro, Dungy did not scare the white devils in power. Additionally, he had the burden of Peyton Manning behind center. Making it improbable that he would ever advance to the big game. And now, we are witnessing a fear and distress overwhelming the NFL, the likes of which has not been seen since Jim Brown was trampling over young white men as if they were mere stalks of wheat.

A Negro head coach will hoist the Lombardi Trophy in victory. The trophy, long a symbol of the indentured servitude forced upon the Negro gladiator shall now be irrevocably placed in the hands of the original human. The original coach.

How can this be? How could the carefully scripted preventive measures taken against the Negro coach have been circumvented? How could Dungy be standing on the podium accepting the Lamar Hunt trophy? With Peyton Manning at QB?

Dungy was dealt a hand meant to be a burden he could not overcome. Armed with possibly (up to now) the worst big game QB out there, Dungy looked fate in the eye and never blinked. Over the course of half a decade, Dungy has imposed his silent but steady will. Dungy has watched Manning put up hall of fame numbers while his blood has been pumped by a quitter's heart. Dungy has had to witness the "Manning Face" first hand as the great statistical QB walked off the field, his inordinately long neck hunch over in shame as he once again blew a big game. But the Negro stock in this head coach prevented Manning's shame and quititude from ever infecting him.

Buoyed by faith and driven by desire, Dungy forced Manning to victory. The acquisition of Adam Vinatieri (if he is Sicilian, we may well claim him as a Negro) was a security shield that would balance out Mannings desire to bury that enormous head, on the end of his girafe like neck, in the sand and be happy with big numbers and a big loss. Try as he might against Baltimore, Manning was counteracted by the leg of Vinateiri. Couple that with Dungy's brilliant job of effecting a "rope a dope" defense for the regular season, and you have a strategy that could not lose.

Over in the NFC, Lovie Smith suffered the indignity of harping questions about Rex Grossman for most of the season. When will you bench him? When will you bring in Griese? Why are still using him?

Well, Smith's brilliance was not evident for a long time. But in the end, the genius is hard to miss. Smith has positioned himself to be a head coach as long as his heart desires. Even if Chicago were to let him go someday, Smith will be hired in a minute elsewhere. And if his Bears' win, he will go down as the greatest coach of all time. He will have won a Super Bowl with Rex Grossman as his QB. That trumps any and all coaching achievements. Rex Grossman as QB. Greatest coach of all time. At least until someone comes along and wins with Corky as their QB.

Rejoice this morning. The original human has retaken his rightful place at the head of the table at the press conferences for Super Bowl week. We invite you to join us in Miami as we enjoy a week of celebrating Negro achievement and fornicating with young white women. See you in South Beach.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Mark McGwire: Sacrificial Lamb

Last week, the powers that be laid the groundwork in what is most clearly an effort to defend their hallowed hall in Cooperstown from the future attack of the man of the man who is rewriting the homerun record.

The deviousness and the institutional depth of this operation are staggering. The ability to organize the voters is cause for concern of the highest magnitude. This demonstration exemplifies the fact that we, as original humans, are powerless against the control exuded over our daily lives by the powers that be through their sharpest and most concentrated weapon; the media.

Less than a decade ago, Mark McGwire was hailed as the savior of baseball. His powerful shoulders, massive thighs and rippling arms generated towering home runs of a frequency never before witnessed. The man was a mutant: and not simply because of the gene which caused his red hair and freckled skin. Worshipped from coast to coast; the white devil relished McGwire's narrow defeat of the dark skinned Sammy Sosa in the quest for the home run record. Not only had the musclebound McGwire set the record, but he had laid waste to a descendant of Shabazz along the way. A double victory and cause for celebration for snowflakes everywhere.

And now, in what should be McGwire's time to look back and celebrate his astounding career with an awaiting enshrinement in Cooperstown, McGwire finds out first hand that the very people that exalted in his achievements and rejoiced in his feats just a few years ago have plunged their dagger like pens deep into his broad, v-tapered back. The very people that authored the Paul Bunyon legend that is Mark McGwire, now, in what the clear mind can only see as a formulated plan to block the future entry of the coming home run king, have painstakingly measured the assassination of McGwire and his legend. Et tu, Brute?

The destruction of McGwire is based on innuendo and suspicion. The fact that he never failed a drug test or that testing wasn't even conducted during his career mean little. In the past, these very same voters have turned their back on documented cheating (see Gaylord Perry). Yet now, these moral lightweights decide that THEY shall defend the sanctity of the game? When less than a decade ago they were privy to the rumors and certainly suspected McGwire of using steroids, but chose instead to portray him as a hero and stifle the rumors.

Barring injury or incarceration (which is certainly an example of the depth and desperation of this attack), Barry Bonds will take the homerun record this year. Securing his own place as both the greatest home run hitter for a season and a career. A thought which tortures the soul of those behind this power play.

Unfortunately for McGwire, he is caught in between. The "voters" need to set a precedent NOW in order to be able to shun Bonds in the future. And McGwire is that precedent.

Be warned: The hatred and jealousy for the original human runs deep in some circles. The evilishness of the white devil is so profound, that at times, he is willing to destroy himself (or his own) to hold us down. By the will of our God, the devil will eventually destroy himself.

Besides, baseball is a billion dollar entertainment business rooted in marketing and ad revenue. What sanctity is there to defend in that? Get over yourselves, voters.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Fire the Schottenheimer?

Marty Schottenheimer has been an NFL head coach for over two decades. Coaching the Browns, Chiefs, Redskins and Chargers. Schottenheimer has developed a modus operandi of typically putting together solid regular seasons, and then departing from the playoffs with the equivalent of a quick tap-out. Retreating to the off season, not caring that his players must live with the pain of the results of his heartless and cowardly coaching. But what can one expect from a man bearing a last name that we at NOIS believe is a Teutonic colloquialism for "slave master".

Forget the common speculation that most anyone with a logical thought process would introduce: Would a Negro coach continually be allowed to fail in such creative ways as Schottenheimer? As we can all agree, this is essentially a rhetorical question in this instance.

Let's return to the players. Men who give all they have. Offseason pain and sweat. In season blood and tears. Effort that is congruous to a fight for survival. And, it is! Men who are given the scraps from the "owners" table. Treated like yard dogs. Forced to not only give mind, body and soul to the organization; but, also to beg (every two or three years) for the leftovers the owners set aside during contract "negotiations". Pride stolen from them. Continually reminded that the man who runs the "team" is the "owner". We shudder at the psychological damage these valiant warriors must endure.

All they have is the game. The fight. The continual pursuit of the victory. For the owner, it means more money. For the warrior, it means he can look himself in the mirror the next morning without turning away in shame.

Let's face it. Schottenheimer's legions are the descendents of the Tribe of Shabazz. Tomlinson, Gates, Merriman, Neal, rookie tackle Marcus McNeill and the rest. These are the men that have made victory possible. The men who represent all those that have marched before them to help feed the family of the Schottenheimer. The men forced to hire representatives on their own behalf who are allowed to meet with the "owners" to beg for a scrap from the table.

Men who have fought to the point of exhaustion and fatigue. So fatigued that immediately after the game, they even become delusional. Example: Tomlinson's disparaging remarks about the Pat's celebration being disrespectful for "mocking" Merriman's dance. Is it disrespectful to mock a choreographed manuever that actually disrespects the opponent to begin with? Of course not. But that is how hard Tomlinson fights. To the point of losing the power of rational thought.

And what do Tomlinson and the rest of the gladiators get in return? They get the playoff coaching prowess of the Schottenheimer. Why not just string them up and whip them? It would be more humane!

Fire the Schottenheimer? Need you even ask?

Monday, January 15, 2007



I just wanted to take this QUICK MOMENT to put it out there that yah boy, Stephen A is in da HOWSE.

Those of you that view ESPN are most DEFINATELY aware that my CRITICALLY ACCLAIMED show, QUITE FRANKLY is no longer on that network.

What you DON'T KNOW is that my show WAS NOT CANCELLED. Ya heard right, NOT CANCELLED. ESPN is a proud network, and I don't wanna hate on them (some o' mah boys are still kicking it there), but the truth has been distorted to SAVE FACE.

In an effort to reach a more FOCUSED AUDIENCE, I have decided to direct the HOOGE amounts of energy it takes to put on such a program as QUITE FRANKLY right here on NOIS.

I will be conducing INTERVIEWS and leading DISCUSSIONS with many of the same peeps that ya'll saw step out on my show, QUITE FRANKLY!

So, KEEP CHECKING in, as the ball will be rolling soon.


Oh, and As-Salaam-Alaikum.

(Just in: Stephen A's first "show" will be a moderated discussion with Jason Whitlock, and a surprise guest. Topic: Why does Jason hate Negroes?)

Sunday, January 14, 2007

Google's Attempt to Silence the NOIS

As visionaries and revolutionaries, we are used to being the targets of repression, oppression and suppression. But to see ourselves under attack from one of the largest media funnels in the world is something we did not expect.

Run a google search of 'nationofislamsportsblog". Two days ago, such a search resulted in finding a direct link to this blog and numerous entries referencing it. Today, only one entry to one reference to this site results, and no direct link to the blog's main page is furnished.

Brothers and sisters, obviously the power of our voice has rocked the world. Google, be warned, the voice of the righteous Tribe of Shabazz can not be silenced through your devious machinations. You are served notice; our beta version of the Nubian centric search engine Nuugle is rapidly approaching preparedness.

We will see how you respond when the dignified and truthful original human assumes control of the global searching needs.

Respect to Berrian and Mohammad

As-Salaam-Alaikum brothers Muhsin Muhammad and Bernard Berrian.

In an act of passive resistance against the continued usage of Bears' QB Rex Grossman as the starter (which can only be attibuteable to the fair color of his skin), brothers Muhammad and Berrian did all they could to try to ensure the quick departure of the Bears from the playoffs.

On what was an important second half drive, Grossman (btw, perfect name for a white devil) threw a pass to Muhammad. Brother Muhammad initiated his protest by promptly taking a thoroughly catchable ball and volleying it with his shoulder into the waiting arms of the Seahawks' defender. At that moment, it seemed to perfectly stall a potential scoring drive at a most important instant of the game.

However, in what can only be presumed was an act to show support for his white devil brethren, San Diego QB Phillip Rivers (a native of Alabama.....enough said) quickly returned the ball to the Bears' possession.

Enter brother Berrian. Witness an out of body experience, as somehow Grossman threw a pass right on the money and in stride to brother Berrian. Berrian responded with the football equivalent of saying "Black and Proud" by dropping a sure touchdown.

Brothers Muhammad and Berrian gave their best efforts in an attempt to protest the continued patronization of the albumen hued quarterback forced on them by the powers that be.

Does anyone believe that if Grossman was named Kareem Harris or Rashad Smith the Bears would have stuck with him for this long?

To brothers Mohammad and Berian, we appreciate your efforts and are as saddened as you are that your team won. We look forward to next week and watching you display the same passive resistance techniques of protest against the Saints.

Saturday, January 13, 2007


We have once again witnessed the resident evil in our existance work its far reaching and painful devil's work. At this point in time, we can not release full disclosure so we shall procede with what is referred to in the achromatic media as a blind item.

As is known to most, one of the most revered sports journalists of our time has recently been stripped by the resident evil of his platform of speech. In an effort to deprive the Negro nation of one of the clearest voices in sport, ESPN has decided to deprive us of the most lucid mind on their roster. Claiming that "ratings" were bad, his television vehicle was cancelled. Ratings? Do the same people that conjure the statistics of the census also fabricate these "ratings"? The same people that perpetuate the lie that the Negro makes up roughly 10% of this country? Or is there another group that, despite the fact that most anyone you TALK to will proudly tell you they watched the show, ribaldly cast the aspersion that it was poorly received by the viewing public. Looking us in the eye with the lie without so much as glancing away.

Well, to make it known. Currently, this sportsblog is developing the concept of providing that bold and articulate individual with a new platform to reach the masses.

Stay tuned for more.


Friday, January 12, 2007

The Conspiracy to Rid the NFL of Negro Head Coaches

As another regular season of the Negroes For Labor league came to an end, two venerable Negro head coaches found themselves out of jobs. The season started with 7 and now there are five. However, attempts to do undo the other coaches were evident to even the untrained eye.

In Oakland, a bastion of Negro culture and refinement, Art Shell was removed from the leading role. Mr. Shell, a member of the football Hall of Fame and a Raider to the end, had taken on the unenviable task of being the plantation "trustee" for one Al Davis. Shell, an honorable and well respected man moved forward with workman like stoicism. Never raising his voice or showing emotion, rarely complaining about the hand he had been dealt, and almost never raising so much as a brow on the sidelines during games. Set up for failure in an effort by the powers that be in an effort to degrade the reputation of Negro coaches everywhere, Mr. Shell did his best with what he had. The end result: one year's work and a pink slip. Reports of Al Davis' demise and diminished thought capacity are greatly exaggerated. Davis clearly masterminded this sabotage attempt on the progression of Negro coaches.

Out in the desert of Arizona, the venerable coach Denny Green was hired to revive a once proud franchise (well, he was hired to revive a franchise). Equipped with a supposedly powerful offense, the expectations were high for Mr. Green. The media saddled Mr. Green with these expectations based on what they saw on paper. A talented rookie QB, a former pro bowl running back and two excellent receivers were to bring success to the Cardinals. Many predicted them as a dark horse (their term, not ours) candidate for a run to the Super Bowl. What the media didn't dwell on was the poor offensive line and habitual lunacy of the ownership. Here, unattainable expectations were levied against this team and the result was watching the blame settle squarely on the broad shoulders of the Negro coach. Another shot from the grassy knoll directed at Negro coaches everywhere.

In Cincinatti and Chicago, it would not be so easy to get rid of the Negro coaches. Both were successful and had made playoff runs the year before and while the Bengals didn't make the playoffs this year; it would be near impossible to fire the coach of that franchise (based on it's pathetic history) for a .500 season. Lovie Smith enjoyed the protection of having the best record in his conference. Assassinating the careers of these two coaches would be an almost insurmountable prospect.

At this point, the conspiracy widens. In Cincinatti, an epidemic of player arrests was implemented in an effort to affront the character of the coach and ignite a grassroots call for his dismissal by claiming he could not control his team. The owners of the franchise, despite a history of mismangement and horrible decision making, knew that even they would not be able to get away with firing Marvin Lewis based on his record. So, rather than that, they risked race riots all over again in Cincinatti by soliciting the help of the police force to dismantle the team Lewis put together. For now, Lewis job is safe, but he has been backed into a corner. It will no longer be sufficient for him to do anything less than suspend or dismiss his players for future "infractions". I fear, that the next round of Bengal arrests will ultimately cost Lewis his job as he will be forced to field a less talented team.

The Halas descendents in Chicago took a bit of a different route in their effort to depose Lovie Smith. Rather than conspiring with the police to conjure up a series of relatively minor offenses, the Bears went with drugs, weapons and murder. Sacrificing Tank Johnson in an effort to destroy the coaching career of Smith. This was the most desperate attempt, and seems to be the one least likely to succeed.

That leaves three black head coaches.

We won't count Romeo Crennel, as he is coaching a minor league team in Cleveland.

Tony Dungy is widely considered one of the most decent men in the NFL, and non-threatening Negroes. So, the idea of destroying his career might be counterproductive. A token or two are required and sought after (the Rooney Rule, which we will address in a future entry). But, his ultimate success and the winning of championships are something that the powers that be can not allow. A Negro coach winning it all would be devasting to their plans. So, Dungy is saddled with the ultimate gristmill around his neck. Peyton Manning. The second coming of Dan Marino will ensure that Dungy never hoists the Lombardi Trophy in victory.

In Kansas City, the suspicious death of Lamar Hunt might eventually be the undoing of Herman Edwards. Mr. Hunt brought Edwards to the Chiefs, and now, he is no longer their to protect him.

Negro coaches in the NFL are marked men and sacrificial lambs. Hired in an effort to present an image of equality and opportunity. Destroyed in an effort to maintain the status quo and solidify the position of the oppressor.

Preferential Treatment of Equines

Daunte Culpepper. Not long ago, certainly the premier Negro QB in football. Renowned for his laser arm and ability to use his size and strength to neutralize pass rushers. Fast forward to career threatening knee injury.

Brother Culpepper endured a vicious hit to the side of his knee (incidently the hit was administered by a player coached by a white man, coincidence?) that tore his ligaments. This ended the season for Culpepper.

The Vikings response? Get rid of him. Certainly, a Negro with a lame leg is of no value to the "owner" of the team, right? Forget about the years of sacrifice and dedication Culpepper gave the team. Forget that the brother's career was now in jeopardy. Cut him. Show the Negro the door. This is the human equivalent of shooting a lame horse.

But Culpepper persevered. He rehabbed and worked to prepare himself to be the starter for the Miami Dolphins. Clearly, his knee was not 100%, but Culpepper cast caution to the wind in his loyalty to the team that signed him. Again, risking everything. Brothers and sisters, this is an example of unmatched courage.

Set back followed. Culpepper was place on the injured reserve list in an effort to give him the opportunity to fully heal. And what did Culpepper get in return? Snowflake Steve Young questioned Culpepper's work ethic. Essentially, he recalled that old favorite stereotype: the lazy Negro. Young belittled Culpepper's leadership and committment on national television. All this done while Culpepper worked furiously to regain the form that had brought him to the top.

Again, the effective equivalent of shooting the lame horse.

But, let's examine what happens to the lame horse. Not the figurative lame horse, but the REAL lame horse. Barbaro!

A threat to win the Triple Crown of horse racing, Barbaro unfortunately snaps his lower leg. The response? Typically, one would think it would be to shoot the horse. But no, that is only good for poor farm horses and Negro athletes. This horse, a favorite in the white dominated world of racing, was airlifted to a special hospital to receive treatment from the worlds premier veterinary clinic. Message boards were errected to discuss his progress and relay messages of good faith and cheer to the HORSE (giving irrefutable evidence of the questionable sanity and intelligence of white folk).

Where is Brother Culpepper's message board?? Do these people realize that if they had put one up for Daunte, unlike the horse, he might be able to read it?

Barbaro was even the recipient of a prestigious Sports Human of the Year award on this site. So a HORSE can win the Sports HUMAN of the Year award, but the original human is called lazy and a poor leader?

Brothers and sisters, you see where the Negro stands in sports?

We carry the tail of the lame horse.

To be clear, we have no beef with a lame horse. Lord knows, they can be delicious if cooked properly and the world needs glue.

Thursday, January 11, 2007

Hockey: Let it Die

White devils on ice. Whirling dervishes on skates. White athletes propelled and assisted by physics to speeds they can not reach on land. The ice. The last refuge and hiding place of the white athlete.

Relegated to minority status in most team sports, the white athlete has retreated to frozen water as a means of preserving his one "major" remaining sports league. Knowing full well the Negro athlete has a traditional distaste for performing on or in water. After all, it was across a great body of water the Negro was shanghaied and stolen.

Two years ago, it looked as if the laws of nature (those same laws which have allowed the original human to survive for greater lengths than any pretender) were going to ring the death knell for hockey. White fans turned their attention elsewhere, not caring. Television networks, including BET, did not care. The only protest wailed from the northern hinterlands of ice and snow. A bastion of white existence. The alabaster minions of the north shed tears for their precious game. Longing to watch the toothless, mulleted "athletes" rely on metal blades for transportation around the ice.

Networks contracted out. Turning the page on hockey without looking back. Finally, the original human athlete had helped close the door on this incidious chapter of sport history. All rested easy in the knowledge that, despite enduring years of bigotry and pseudoathleticism, hockey would be wiped off the sports landscape. Even the white fan appreciated this.

As Negroes, we turned our attention to NASCAR, hoping that Jay-Z or Carmello Anthony would invest in the future of Negro America by developing a racing team to return the world of autoracing to the original human. While our eyes were diverted, the white devil sprung into action.

Hockey players agreed to pay cuts. A new network was conjured to carry the "sport". And, like the rebirthed spawns of satan, the return. Brawling, bearded and unevolved monoliths reappeared from the frozen northern wasteland.

If And-1 Streetball was wiped off the map, do you imagine that their would be a concerted effort to bring it back? Would some made up television network appear to carry the games? Would the street ballas agree to pay cuts? Never!

We have witnessed an unnatural act by the resusitation of hockey. Rest assured tho, brothers and sisters, in the end there is no escaping the laws of nature. As sure as Tiger Woods will tip Jack Nichlaus from throne of golf; our inner strength and devotion to righteousness will in the end reduce hockey to nothing but a bitter memory we will never have to watch again.

Besides, our cable company doesn't carry Versus anyway.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

The White Blue Devil Is Defeated

Salaam aleikum, Paul Hewitt.

Your Georgia Tech Black Jackets defeated the ultimate white devil, Mike Krshewissdiyssky and his evil forces of oppression, in the subhuman form of Duke Blue Devils.

For years slave master coach KKK has built his fortune and fame on the back of the original human. In turn, slave master coach KKK has tried to give the credit to the white players that have reaped the benefits of the Negro teamates around them. Jay Bilas, Bobby Hurley, Christian Laetner...etc, have all been products of their Negro teamates. Held in esteem and on high as they paraded themselves mounted atop the Negro throes beneath them.

How times have changed in Durham. Now, slave master coach KKK doesn't have the great numbers of talented Negro soldiers to fight his battles as in the past. Now his white players are exposed for what they are. Greg Paulus and Mcwhatever his name is are shown to be little more than above average players.

This season is shaping up to be payback for the thievery of slave master coach KKK. He stole the talent and energy of the Negro player for years. They gave all so he could be placed on a pedestal by Dick Vitale and amass a fortune. In return, what did they get? Besides brother Elton Brand, when is the last time a Duke player was prepared to make an impact and reap the benefits of NBA superstardom?

Titles and victories. A fortune. Slave master coach KKK may as well ride his Negro players around campus.

The greatest player the White Blue Devils ever gave the NBA was Mike Gminski. An act Negroes everywhere will never forgive.

White Females: Still, the Media Ignores the Nubian Sister

It is an indisputable fact that the U.S. media treats the white female as though her value is unsurpassed. A story of a white female harmed or injured or simply mistreated receives an inordinate amount of airtime. From the disappearance of the white trollip in Aruba to runaway brides to Rosie O'Donnell; the U.S. media bombards us with coverage.

Let a Nubian sister be the news maker, and the story is quickly relegated to BET or Jet magazine.

And now, yet another instance of the white female being given unmitigated press/media coverage.

For those that watched the USC-Michigan Rose Bowl, one of the larger stories after the Black Trojans of USC disembowled the Dark Wolverines of Michigan, was the young USC cheerleader and her unfortunately high riding undergarment.

A young, WHITE female USC cheerleader's buttocks were exposed in all their orbital glory. The onion shaped booty, free of the obstruction of the expected fabric overture, bouncing and rippling in a glorious display of athleticism and rhythmic undulation. Now, certainly as a Negro man, this tantalizing display of white gluteal magnificence was appreciated. And, in the future, encouraged. But, despite this obvious effort to distract the Negro viewer from the objectification of the Negro athletes, one can not help feel that if the cheerleader were a Nubian sister the story would have been buried and ignored.

Do you mean to tell me that not one pair of Nubian buttocks have escaped the imprisonment of the white man's cheerleader uniform and been exposed for all the world to see? This is not remotely believeable. Have you seen the size of the typical Nubian cheerleader buttock? Do you know what a hottentot is? And not one instance of this happening?

Brothers and sisters, we have again been subjected to the media bias that is always evident in stories involving white women. The media has once again perpetrated the injustice of flaunting the white female on the front page and relegating the Nubian sister to the back of the bus.

As Negro men, we encourage the media to occassionally tantalize us with the delectable hind offerings of the white female. But, again as Negro men, we ask: Can we get some black ass? Cut a brother a break!

Saban: A $32M Slave Master

Well, slavery in the deep south remains an institutionally approved and profitable proposition. The University of Alabama recently fired their football coach, ostensibly because he did not win enough games. In turn, the University, which has been represented for the past two and a half decades by the most athletic and bright young Negroes the State of Alabama could find, hired a coach without so much as pretending to consider allowing a Negro to head the program.

Here, we have a football team steeped in the mighty traditions of Bear Bryant (a reknowned hater and eventual user of the original human), still refusing to acknowledge that the Negro is capable of doing more than pulling the plow and picking the cotton. A young Negro is good enough to wear the cherished Alabama football jersey and give his blood, sweat and tears so that the landowners in the stands can feel as though they, too, have won the game; yet, he that would lead these young Negro soldiers onto the battlefield to fight for the glory of the Univeristy must be white. He must be cut in the mold of the landowner. Symbolic of the desire to return the Negro to shackles and shanties.

To add insult to the Negro injury, the State has agreed to bequeath a tender of $32M dollars on the new plantation boss. Yes, $32M dollars to browbeat, mold and prod our young Negro soldiers to victory in the name of the University of Alabama. A quick glance at one of the proud HBCU's in Alabama, Alabama State University, shows that the football coach there (a black man) is payed $12.17 an hour to coach his team; a group of young Negroes who DO NOT represent the landowners and plantation descendents that fill the stadium in Tuscaloosa each Saturday in the fall.

The angry folk in Miami resorted to calling the new Alabama slave master, Nick "Satan". We at the Nation of Islam believe this is an adequate moniker. He represents the continuing challenge to the sovereignty of the Negro and the unhidden desire of the plantation Alabama to perpetuate the good fortunes of the white devil at the expense of the opportunity of the Negro.

By Allah, this can not be denied.

Nation of Islam Sportsblog

A resounding "good day" from the Nation of Islam, as we pursue or path of righteousness and brotherhood by venturing into the world of sports.

Anticipate a view of the sports world through the eyes of the original members of the Tribe of Shabazz.

As the original humans, the view through our eyes is the only authentic view.

In the words of the Honorable Elijah Muhammad: "We don't hate white folk. We just don't like 'em much."